Glad to see you again,
Today has been extremely difficult.
Between preparing for Christmas, school parties and programs, entertaining, and the constant pressure to “keep up,” the days feel heavier than usual. The extra noise, changes in routine, expectations, and transitions make everything more challenging—for Adilynn and for me. What should feel joyful often feels overwhelming, and some days it takes everything I have just to hold it together.
If this season feels hard instead of magical, you’re not alone. Slowing down, letting go of perfection, and giving ourselves grace matters now more than ever.
Some days feel impossibly long.
The yelling.
The demands.
The constant correcting, adjusting, and trying again.
My days are often filled with loud protests from Adilynn. She doesn’t want to wear a coat when it’s 10 degrees outside. It’s not the right paintbrush she pictured in her mind. Her shoes feel wrong—even though they’re brand new—so we try something else. Her food has to be fixed a certain way, and when it’s not, the unkind words come quickly.
Autism isn’t something you can discipline out of a child. You can’t force things to be done “the normal way.” We try all the tools, all the strategies, and still—many days feel like major setbacks.
And it takes a toll.
I’m exhausted. Short-fused. My mind races with everything that needs to be done, constantly interrupted by yelling and urgent demands from a 5-year-old who needs more than I sometimes feel capable of giving.
I wish I could say I don’t react. I wish it didn’t affect me so deeply. But the truth is—some days it’s debilitating.
And yet… there is beauty here.
After the storms, Adilynn wraps her arms around me with the biggest hugs. “I love you more than the whole world.” She’s compassionate, loving, and so funny. Her favorite thing right now is knock-knock jokes—repeated over and over again—and somehow they still make me smile.
We love her more than life itself.
But loving her doesn’t mean this journey isn’t hard.
So how do I take care of me?
Honestly, I don’t do self-care as often as I should. I’m a people-pleaser by nature, and everyone else usually comes first. But when I do need to calm and reset, these are the 5 things that help me the most.
1. Step Outside—Even for 5 Minutes
When my nervous system is fried, fresh air helps ground me. I’ll step onto the porch, take a few deep breaths, and just exist for a moment. No fixing. No talking. Just breathing. Even five quiet minutes can reset my body.
2. Lower the Bar (and the Guilt)
Not every day needs to be productive. Some days survival is the win. I remind myself that it’s okay if the house is messy, dinner is simple, or plans get canceled. Resting is not failing—it’s necessary.
3. Put Something in My Ears
Noise can be incredibly overstimulating. I’ll put in earbuds and listen to calming music, a podcast, or even white noise while doing chores. It helps drown out the chaos and gives my brain something soothing to focus on.
4. Let Myself Feel Without Fixing
Sometimes I don’t need solutions—I just need to feel. I allow myself to cry, vent, or journal without judgment. Naming the hard emotions instead of pushing them away makes them feel lighter.
5. Remember Who She Is Beyond the Hard Moments
When I feel completely worn down, I think about her laughter, her hugs, her silly knock-knock jokes. I remind myself that the hard moments are not all of her—and they are not a reflection of my failure as a mom.
If you’re walking a similar road, please know this:
You’re not weak for feeling tired.
You’re not failing because it’s hard.
And you’re allowed to take care of yourself, too.
This journey is real. The struggles are real.
But so is the love—and sometimes, that’s enough to keep going. 
Blessings,
Julie